Waiting, and Waiting, and Waiting

Here we are again, putting our lives on hold. I am really trying to be accommodating, but I don't appreciate having to change my plans at the last minute.  The baby is supposed to have a supervised visit on Wednesdays with his parents, but one of them has started a new job and may not be able to make it.  There was a request to change the visits to the weekend, but that doesn't really work for us.  I know how that sounds, but I am not a glorified babysitter/nanny and I am not willing to change the visit day.  I don't mind one weekend a month, but not every weekend. 

I spoke with the grandmother early this afternoon, and she said she had not heard from the parents yet. That seems to be the pattern here.  The parents don't call CPS back, they don't call the grandmother back, the don't call the behavioral people back, and they don't respond to emails in a timely fashion.  Really?  How badly do you want to get your baby back?  Let us be grown ups and take some responsibility, please.

So, here I am waiting for the confirmation phone call.  Do we have an appointment tomorrow or not?  Are we rescheduling?  I did make plans for myself tomorrow so I had something to do during the two and a half hour visit, but I guess that isn't going to happen.  Considering I spend 24/7 with the baby, I would love some "Me Time".  Even if that means finding a park and reading a book, getting a cup of coffee, or going to get a massage, I still would like to take some time out for myself.

I am wondering at what point I get to cancel the appointment without looking like the bad guy.  I suppose it is past time to set some ground rules, but clearly we need to.  Since we are still new at this I am not quite sure what to do, but I would guess a call to the CPS caseworker is in order.  I can't imagine CPS expects the foster parents to put everything on hold and be at the mercy of the bio parents.  After all, I'm not the one trying to prove I should get my baby back.

I'm still not sure how to process these feelings and have found out that our foster agency is now offering a support group.  I can't tell you how excited I am about this.  I can't wait to meet other foster parents and learn how they deal with different situations and their emotions.  I can't wait to hear their stories and network.  I am hoping we meet another family that lives near us.  That would be great!