Ugh!

Adjusting to the new little guy has been nothing short of a challenge.  Being the baby of a lot(!) of kids, he hasn't had much, if any, discipline.  I thought he had some developmental delays, but then I realized that he was blatantly ignoring me.  Isn't 14 months a little young to completely tune someone out?  He doesn't respond to anything, including his name, and will stare blankly off into space.  Completely frustrating.

Temper tantrums are the name of the game with this one.  He doesn't speak (only uses four words), so instead of trying to communicate he will whine and literally throw himself into things.  He throws himself into the crib railing, the tile floor, walls, furniture, and he just barely missed the brick fireplace the other day.  It is so aggravating that he is over a year old and doesn't talk.  He should at least be able to say milk, ball, or down, instead of a grunt, a whine, and a complete freak out.  I am trying to work with him but he is not interested, and when I try he throws a fit.  Awesome.

Bedtime and nap time are ridiculous.  It turns out that he was NEVER put to bed alone.  He would always sleep with someone else, meaning he did not have a set nap time or bedtime.  He goes to bed crying and screaming, wakes up throughout the night, and wakes up crying in the morning.  Thank God the other baby is so mellow- he just rolls over and goes to sleep.

There has been a little bit of a decrease in the amount of tantrums thrown.  I think he may be beginning to realize that I don't tolerate this behavior.  You can throw your fit- in the Pack N Play (to avoid injury), but I will not engage.  I will tell you no, and I don't give in to tiny tyrant tantrums or demands.  We'll get there eventually, and then he will go to another placement and I will get to start all over again with the next placement.  Tis the life of a foster family.

I do my best to give them the love and attention they require and meet their needs.  Some days are harder than others, and I pray for bedtime. And other days I question what I am doing and want to bang my head into the wall.  I am so grateful that I have fantastic friends who are more than willing to help me out, whether at their home or mine.  This would be so much harder if it weren't for you.

Being a foster parent is rewarding, but it is also more difficult than I thought it would be.  You cannot discipline foster kids like you would your own.  The only form of acceptable discipline is time out, and we all know that doesn't work on some kids- especially ones who lack any kind of discipline.  Sure, let me get this one-year-old to sit in the same spot, quietly, for 60 seconds.  There is also the last minute visits, dealing with manipulative parents, and always waiting for information.

I wake up every day hoping that today will be better.  We will bond a little more, work on communicating, play together, and hopefully have at least one less tantrum.  Here's to another day of opportunity!